Happy anniversary to my honey and me!

Today is my hubby's and my 17th wedding anniversary!  How these years have flown by...


Marriage is funny, isn't it?  Only God could have created such a relationship--it's downright amazing, really, when you think about it.  We are born into a family.  We automatically have parents, brothers and sisters, aunts, uncles, grandparents...and we love our immediate family members, usually unconditionally, because God created this bond between parent and child.  When we have children of our own, we normally automatically love them too.  They are from our own flesh, after all (and adopted children become grafted in just like our biological children.)


But marriage is different.  Here is a person who was a stranger.  You meet, decide you like this person, feel attracted to them, "fall in love" with them, and ultimately decide and make a covenant to spend the rest of your life together.  You become "one flesh" with this person whom you did not even know just a relatively short time before.  Through the mountains and valleys of life you weather the storms together,  even when you, yourselves in your sinful natures are the embodiment of those very storms.  And through it all you love each other with the most intimate love God has given  us to experience on this earth aside from Himself. This person you once didn't even know.  Isn't that interesting when you think about it?  I think it is. 

Of course it makes sense that marriage is not easy.  It would be a miracle if it were.  But isn't it sweet when you are relying on Him to help you, and deciding that come what may, you are going to be committed to this person, that God is going to bless you so abundantly?  And isn't it a little bit of heaven when we are enjoying our marriage the way God intends it to be...such a beautiful picture of God's love for us.  He is the bridegroom, and we are the bride. 


I hope you will commit yourself again to your spouse today.  Do something special for him or her, and be thankful for your life's partner-- even if you're going through a rough patch.  Pray and trust God.  He can do amazing things, and He will bless you when you honor Him and your commitment to each other!


I know this song is kind of old now, and I'm sure just about everyone has heard it, but I still really like it.  So just in case you haven't heard it, or even if you have, listen and enjoy!

Andrew Peterson (One of my very favorite singer/songwriters)--Dancing in the Minefields.  http://youtu.be/_Gs3fg_WsEg

We love Dad!!

Yesterday was a special day.  Yes, it was Father's Day, and it was my hubby's birthday!!

I interviewed all the kids and put their answers in a big card.  Here are some high-lites:

If I could get or do anything for Dad for Father's Day, it would be...  "a 71" flat screen LCD TV."  --Jacob

Dad's a great dad because...  "he wrestles with us, and he lets me mow the lawn."  --Josh

Dad is funny when he...  "is around Uncle Greg."  --Cassandra   (They are brothers, and she is right.  They are something else when they get together.)

Dad's a great dad because...  "he buys us, like, the Wii, and he lets us go in the pool, and he swims in the pool with us, and he made us our log cabin room."  --Ben

If I could get or do anything for Dad for Father's Day, it would be...  "a phone, and a briefcase." --Ben

Dad's a great dad because... "he's great because he's great!"  --Sarah

What do you like to do with Daddy?  "I like to Dad tickle me." --Sarah

When is Daddy funny?  "That's so crazy, Daddy.  He's crazy."  --Sarah

What would you like to get Daddy for a present?  "Hmmmm,  hmmmmm,  how 'bout a present?"

What kind of present?  "A purple present."

I am so thankful for my wonderful husband!  A man who loves the Lord and strives to live for Him.. Who makes me laugh...Who can work on the engine, paint a picture, plant a garden, fix stuff that breaks, program a computer, teach science, and bake a cake!  One who prays with our kids and plays with our kids, and teaches our boys what it means to be a man.  Happy birthday and Father's Day, Man of Mine.  I love you!!!

 He's great at Nerf fights...even though he kind of cheats...

 He makes cool stuff like working, hospital  "light fingers!"

 He doesn't mind a rubber band fight--3 against one.

 He's a great story teller.

 He knows how to program robots!

 He's great at wrestling.

 Don't ask. ; )

 He makes stuff with us.

 He's good at snuggling.

 He spends time with us.

 He plays video games.

 He teaches us how to plant things,

 And use our hands to make things...

 He plays with us.

And swims with us.

And lets us help.

We love you, Dad!!!

Our Little Spat

Every now and then I hope you don't mind if I stray from the topic of Sarah and the kids to something else.  Today it's something you can chew on.  And it's a personal story about a little "discussion" we had.  That's always a good read, isn't it?


So...remember in my last post I mentioned that the devil began to attack us after our great news.  First, Scott had to work a lot and I was really tired.  Then, Ben got that stomach flu, and if anyone is reading this who knows me for real, they know that when I say I hate the stomach flu, I really, really mean it.  I mean, we might get it in our house once or twice a year, and those days are the very worst days of the year for me.  That is how badly I hate it.  I get stressed trying to keep everyone else from getting it, and I am afraid of getting it myself.  And I do everything possible to avoid getting a germ from someone in the house.  I change clothes after hugging the sick person, I do not kiss my husband,  just IN CASE he might be harboring the germ without knowing it.  And this all came on the heels of me being in the hospital for a long time and he had a cold (and so we were not really snuggly then either...)  Well, things were stressful. 


So, he asked me out on a date on Friday.  Cassandra agreed to babysit, and I was glad to get out of the house.  I could tell that he wasn't very happy as we were leaving, so I asked him what was wrong. 


I will keep our conversation private, but suffice it to say that he told me something about how he felt about my behavior.  And it wasn't positive.  He wasn't mean, and it was just matter of fact, but he just laid it right out there on the table.


Well, that was just about all I could take right then.  Seriously??  You tell me this right now??  I was so hurt and angry.  My gut reaction was to go on and on about how we had the stomach flu in the house, and I just got out of being in the hospital for 3 weeks, and our daughter just got done having cancer, for goodness sake, and he wasn't exactly being Prince Charming either, and you get the picture.  I was just so hurt.  Oh, it was not a pretty sight in that car I am sorry to say. : (


We didn't go out together, I was so upset.  Instead, I went to the mall, and got some warm soup and hot tea at a book store, and planned on nursing my misery.  Only, something else happened.  As I sat there and stewed for a while, I also started praying about the whole thing.  And as I prayed, I decided to stop pitying myself and start thinking rationally about what he said.  And the more I did that, the more I realized he was right.  *GASP*!  Now, I knew he was not perfect either, and his timing for telling me how he felt was probably not the best, considering how stressed I had been, but the thing he told me was correct.  And I knew that I needed to repent and apologize, no matter how difficult that would be.  By the time I left for home, I was pretty well done being angry at him, and planning out what I was going to say. 


Things were strained that evening, but I did tell him that he was right and I was sorry, and I even refrained from saying anything to him about all the times he wronged ME... (You know how tempting that is.)


This is a very personal story, and I really didn't want to share our dirty laundry with you, but I did it for a reason.  Early in our marriage, I was very bad at this.  This scenario most likely would not have happened, because we both tended to be me-centered, and it was hard for us to apologize without pointing out the other one's faults.  When something icky came between us like this, sometimes it would take a long time for it to get resolved because we were both so stinking stubborn. 


But since I allowed the Lord to speak to my heart and do things His way, this little spat ended very differently.  My hubby apologized too, for making me so upset, and he admitted that he had not been the perfect husband either.  The rift was mended immediately.  I am not so scared about that stomach bug anymore, so we even smooched some. ; )  And today that man of mine was going out of his way to make me feel loved--including cleaning the kitchen for me.


There are two ways we can handle it when we are angry with our spouse.  We can get defensive and angry and nurse our pain, or we can think about what they said, apologize, and let it go.  Did you know that the Bible tells us all the answers about how we should handle every situation?  And if we just listen and obey, the result is always the best!  How I wish I had learned that part about being repentant and selfless a long time ago...but I hope you can learn it and use it in your marriage now!

Sunday Snapshot--Dad

I got this idea from Stephanie's blog, Ni Hao Ya'll.  Each Sunday she posts pictures instead of a normal post.  I thought I would do that too, and each time post some of my favorite pictures that may or may not be recent. 

This week I am focusing on my wonderful hubby, who probably gets the least amount of mention on this blog.  But he is such a great husband and daddy.  We are so blessed to have him!!

Thoughts about Marriage

Let thy fountain be blessed, and rejoice with the bride of thy youth...Proverbs 5:18

Yesterday was my hubby's and my anniversary. Sixteen years ago we tied the knot! And four years before that we started dating. So later this month we will have been together for.....

20 years!!!!!!

And considering the fact that I only feel like I'm about 25, that sounds pretty weird to me. ; )

As I pondered this thought the other day (because I'm a pondering kind of person), as I was on my way to an appointment with Sarah which is where I so often am these days, I reflected on our lives together.

Scott and I started dating in 1990. I was only 15 years old. Friends, I would not let my daughters start dating that young!! But, my momma did, so that's what happened. I love the way our relationship started. I wasn't interested in him at first for anything more than a friend, so all the "wooing" came from him. And we really did get along great as friends to start. That's the best way to begin a relationship, for sure. There's a whole story about how we started "going together," or whatever we called it back then, but that will be for another day.

So, after 4 years of that--and 4 years is definitely a LONG time to wait when you are dating, but we needed to grow to be adults first...--we got married. I was 19 (almost 20, I liked to remind people like my parents who thought I was too young), and Scott was 21. We were oh, so very young. I don't regret getting married that young even one little bit, but when I see girls who were my age at the time, I can't believe I got married that young.

I think our marriage has been pretty typical. I don't think anyone would be surprised to know it has not always been easy. I am pretty sure no marriage is always easy, since we do not live in heaven yet. In fact, there have been times in our marriage that were downright difficult. Times when I wondered what in the world I ever married that punk for...(Did I just say that out loud??) And I know he must have thought the same about me. But after all this time, I think we have discovered the secret to a really great marriage. We learned it over time, and sometimes the hard way. And here it is:

Marry the right person. : ) I just threw that in there even though it's probably a given, but sometimes it needs to be said. I married the right person when I married Scott. I loved him with my heart, but I also thought logically about him with my head. We shared core beliefs and values. I knew he would be the kind of person who would provide for our family. I knew what a strong family background he had. I knew how much he loved the Lord. I knew he was the kind of person who would be a good leader in our home, both Spiritually and otherwise. And I really liked him as a person, and that is really important! All of these things will help you to hang in there when times get tough. So, if you are single and reading this, pray and think about who you marry. And if you are already married, go on to the next step...

Die to yourself. That means, get rid of selfishness. I know it sounds so simple, but really, the more I thought about it, when we were going through problems or bumps in our road, it ALWAYS boiled down to one or both of us being selfish. We used to both be pretty bad at this step, and thankfully, we have been growing in the Lord over the years, and learning little by little. We are still not perfect, but oh, how sweet our marriage has been growing as we have learned to grasp this. God wants to bless your marriage, but as long as pride and selfishness are in the way, He really can't do much with it. God will help you if you let Him!

And the third step is....Hang in there! Do not give up. Don't cop out and call it quits! Keep going, keep loving even when you don't feel like it. Aside from obvious reasons, like your life being in danger, or something like that, I want to encourage you to not give up on your marriage. I have seen marriages on the brink of destruction that have come back to life, and there were times in our marriage when we did feel like it was just too hard. But now I am so relieved that we didn't entertain that thought! Our marriage is stronger now than it has ever been. We are reaping the rewards of obeying God and choosing to love each other even when we did not feel like we could. I am just so very thankful for my wonderful husband! He is such a blessing and truly a gift from God. He isn't perfect, but neither am I. ; )

Happy anniversary to US!! And I pray that you will have many happy anniversaries too. : )